Do they listen? Do they hear you?

Teenage hummingbirds don't listen to mmom
Even in nature Teenagers don’t listen to their moms!

Whether you are a high schooler talking a suicidal friend down from the ledge, or a teacher, parent, or trainer, you want to be heard. You want them to listen to you and act on it.

Is anyone listening? Do they hear me? We often wonder. We say a lot of things. Counselors, parents, and trainers prepare our remarks with the hope these gems falling from our lips will make a positive or life-changing impact on the listeners. We don’t know if we’re heard, even if they nod in agreement. Did our words hit home?

Confirmation they heard comes in little gifts here and there

Early in my career I had a wonderful confirmation that has motivated me on my lowest days. I retell it to encourage all of the above people to say your piece and let God do the rest. Memory is an amazing thing. “When the student is ready, the teacher shows up.”

I had started my new speaking business on a shoestring after being an administrator for years. When a mentor asked me what I would do if money were no object, I answered without hesitation: “Start a Training Business!” He told me to “go and claim your inheritance, Beth. Claim the gifts you’ve been given and do this.”

So I did. I was fortunate to have many clients immediately. I’d been in Hawaii for a couple of decades and knew a lot of people. Still, being a 24/7 marketer had its challenges.

Listen and ye shall receive

On the way to church one Sunday morning I was yelling at God. “Please tell me if this is the right path for me! This is TOOOOOO HARD! I need a sign!”

I sat through the sermon and… nothin’. Then I listened to the readings and the songs – nothin’. I was standing outside with friends for coffee hour when a young woman I didn’t recognize approached me. “Are you Beth Terry?” Me: “Ummm, yes?” Not sure what she wanted.

“I want to thank you for saving my life.” A little taken aback I asked her how I had done that.

“Do you remember about 8 years ago when you gave a talk at Central Intermediate?”

“Yes. Yes, I do.”

“Remember you were there to teach all those kids how to interview for jobs?”

“Right. That was fun.”

“Well, you may remember there was a Goth girl standing at the back of the room rolling her eyes and shaking her head at all your great advice?’

“Oh, right! Yes, I remember her!” Visions of a girl with a bad attitude in dark eye liner, a pitbull necklace, black fingernails and head-to-toe black clothing popped into my head.

“That was me.”

“Wow. Good job recovering,” I said to the very polished young lady standing in front of me. “So, how did I save your life?”

She heard me – when she needed to

“About 3 years ago, I was sitting on my lanai with a razor blade to my wrist. Suddenly I heard your voice in my head. I put down the razor, went inside and washed all the Goth off, got dressed and went downtown to look for a job. I got hired!”

Me, trying not to tear up, “Wow. Congratulations! What on earth did I say?”

“You ended your speech to us by saying, ‘Everybody has something good about them and something they need to work on. Expand the good and work on the stuff that needs it. Then go out into the world and make it better because you were born.”

Tears flowed down my face as I hugged her. “That’s pretty good. Sounds like something I say all the time. I’m so happy you heard it!”

“Well I only heard it when I needed it…”

This isn’t about you

And that, my friends, is why you should never worry if it doesn’t appear you were heard. Even if they don’t act on it, when their brains listen, it gets recorded somewhere. People hear things when they are ready, not necessarily when you say them. The brain is an amazing instrument. It has the capacity to store things for later. So keep giving your messages of hope and encouragement. Some day they will hear you. And remember, you are the messenger. It’s not about you. It’s about them. They will hear you when they need to.

Now, get out in the world and make it better because you were born!

Blessings,

Beth

 

 

More tips on how to communicate clearly

@2019 Beth Terry, BethTerry.com, Beth Terry Events

PS – I have room for Two more coaching clients for my one-on-one Public Speaker Coaching. Email me! You’ll be glad you did!

Thank You, Mahalo, Gracias

 Thank You for Being Part of our 30-year Journey!

 

Beth Terry Gratitude card
Thank you all for 30 years! Here’s to 30 more!

What a wild ride it has been. Trips out to Southeast Asia, to Canada, to every state in the United States! Half a million people and more than 3,000 speeches. Many visits to the TSA with 3 million air miles and countless more road trips.

I have been blessed to live my dream of being a Professional Speaker, with topics on everything from Resilience and Change, to Critical thinking and Decision Making, to Customer Service and Conflict Resolution.  I’ve sold over 15,000 copies of my books and coached nearly 100 people to Professional Speaker Status.

Over the years I’ve been able to work with an amazing array of wonderful people. If you’re reading this, you are probably one of them. It’s such an honor to be invited into corporate and associate settings to deliver their messages of motivation and information. And it’s a privilege to work with individuals as they work towards becoming Pros on stage in their own right.

I’m still here!

I’m still giving presentations. I’m still writing books. And I’m still coaching people to be better speakers and speech writers. It has been a roller coaster sometimes with the wonky economy we had the last decade or so. But still, looking out into the audience and watching those popcorn poppers go off in people’s eyes tells me this is important work.

I believe in people. I know we are in a tough time in this country with a lot of divisiveness. But I also know that deep down most of us want the same things: 1) to make it through our day; 2) to take care of someone or something we love; and 3) to improve our lives in some way. People are people whether in Madison, South Dakota or Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. We’re all pedaling as fast as we know how. We all have good days and challenging days.

If I can be there for you or for your people to turn the challenging days into life lessons, and to celebrate your successes, then I’m happy.

Let me know how I can serve you. And know that I appreciate you from the bottom of my heart.

So once again: Thank You, Mahalo, Gracias, Salamat, Xièxiè, Terima kasih, and Tnx eh?

A hui hou (Till we meet again.)

© 2018 Beth Terry EverybodysLost.com

@2019 Beth Terry Events • BethTerry.com • All Rights Reserved

Overwhelmed?

You Can Conquer Your Overwhelm!

Feeling like this lately?

You aren’t alone. Overwhelm seems to be a natural state for many these days. We live in an information-rich society. A lot of it is not useful or correct. It’s misleading, or just nonsense. Now we have to add to our workload by researching and sifting through the nonsense to find the truth.

The result? We procrastinate. If something looks like too much work, we put it off. We feel dread at the thought of tackling it. Then comes discouragement or disillusion. As one comedian has said, “There are just too many tabs open in my brain!”

I can relate. I’m an information junkie. I am easily distracted by new information or an interesting story. My dad’s mantra was always, “Look it up!” So I do. That leads to another story, another vignette, another interesting picture. I want to know it all! I love to read and know that when I retire, I’ll spend entire days doing just that.

But that doesn’t get the work done today!

These aren’t the only causes of Overwhelm, but they’re the ones that resonate with me. Other causes include Mongoose Management, or Chaos Management; Manager’s Myopia (shortsightedness); and the need to be a Superhero!! We know that person. They always swoop in to save the day. We let them because we’re in overwhelm and they seem to know what they’re doing…

There are other causes, but what matters are the SOLUTIONS! Here are a few I cover in my programs on this topic:

  • FOCUS ~ Pay attention to where you are focused and control that. If you’re like me and easily – SQUIRREL! – distracted, try setting a timer and committing to stay focused on one thing for 12 minutes. Then reset the timer and go for another 12. The words I use are, “I will read that while I’m eating dinner and not before…”
  • FIND SOLUTIONS ~ Too many times we focus on blame. Unless lawyers are going to get involved, is this really important? Recognizing the source of a problem is a good idea. But let it go! Instead, narrow your focus and ask, “What can I do RIGHT NOW to address this? What can I do in an hour? In a week?”
  • DETACH! If you’ve known me for very long you know this is a biggie. Here’s what I wrote this last New Years Day: “Remember to Detach. Step back from social media, step away from big crowds for a bit. Let go of relatives who make you crazy (love them from afar!) Forget trying to control other people. BREATHE.”
  •  MAKE HEALTHY CHOICES ~ How long do you think you have? Really. How long do you think you’ll get away with making bad choices? Choices have consequences. You’ll never get today back. Choose Wisely. Remember this:

You are the only person who is 100% affected by 100% of the choices you make!

  • CREATE GOOD HABITS ~ What do you want your life to look like in a year? What habits can you create to get you there? One step at a time. One tiny exercise at a time. One walk with the dog. One change in bedtime. One elimination of another bad habit and replacement with a good one.

You got this.

Tell you what. I can schedule a live Zoom conversation with you and your team called Conquering Overwhelm and Becoming Productive. I’ve kept the price low so you can do this. Everyone who joins us will get access not only to the personalized recording, but also to a gift basket of downloads that will help you as you lower your stress and improve your life. Contact me and let’s get this new Post-Covid life going! This will be great fun, funny, and stress relieving.

See you there!

Contact me here – https://everybodyslost.com/contact-beth/

To your health!

Beth

 

 

© 2021 Beth Terry Events • All Rights Reserved

Improve Your Health? Get a Dog

A Little Dog Inspiration:

©2015 Beth Terry, EverybodysLost.com Xena Chihuahua
My little Xena Princess Warrior – 5 pounds of sweet long-haired Chihuahua charm, RIP

With so much trouble in the world, it helps to occasionally focus on simple gifts offered by our angels in fur coats. Having a rough day? Cast your eyes on their sweet face. More than half the households in America own one or more dogs. Many Americans clearly rely on four-legged inspiration and loyalty to make it through our day. We call it unconditional love. Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t.

Sure, cynics believe our dogs only love us because we’re their food source. Or maybe they lick our faces because they like salt. Most of us don’t care why they’re so excited to see us, we’re just glad someone is!

If we could chill out and be more like our four-legged friends our lives might be more peaceful. Dogs are just who they are. No excuses. They unabashedly flop down on the floor and fall asleep wherever they are. We scold them and they still love us. If they could talk, I doubt they would say, “Does this collar make my face look fat?” They usually can get along with dogs of different colors and “races” with no problem at all. Then again my Chihuahua thinks she’s a Rottweiler, so she does have to make sure you know who’s boss. Indeed, Dorothy Hinshaw captured that when she said, “Even the tiniest Poodle or Chihuahua is still a wolf at heart.

Here’s an assortment of quotes showcasing why we love them…

Starting with a wise quote by Harry Truman who knew about Washington, DC better than most:

You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog.
– Harry Truman

The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue.
– Aerosmith song

If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.
– Will Rogers

Dogs have given us their absolute all. We are the center of their universe. We are the focus of their love and faith and trust. They serve us in return for scraps. It is without a doubt the best deal man has ever made.
– Roger A. Caras

Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that
you are wonderful.
– Ann Landers

There is no psychiatrist in the world
like a puppy licking your face.
– Ben Williams

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you

Olive is ready to play, Beth's Chihuahua-French Bulldog
Wanna Play?

more than they love themselves.
– Josh Billings

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.
– Mark Twain

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
– Andy Rooney

I have found that when you are deeply troubled, there are things you get from the silent devoted companionship of a dog that you can get from no other source.
– Doris Day

Ever wonder if other dogs think poodles
are members of a weird religious cult?
– Rita Rudner

If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience.
– Woodrow Wilson

If your dog is fat, YOU aren’t getting enough exercise.
Dr. Randy Aronson, Pet Vet

My dog is worried about the economy because
Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That’s almost $21.00 in dog money.
– Joe Weinstein

Ever consider what our dogs must think of us?
We come back from a grocery store with the most amazing
haul – chicken, pork, half a cow.
They must think we’re the greatest hunters on earth!
– Anne Tyler

Such short little lives our pets have to spend with us, and they spend most of it watching for us to come home each day.
– John Grogan
~~~~~

If you have a dog, hug it. Bring it to work if you can. If you have no dog, volunteer at a shelter and soon you will have a dog, or two, or three.

Enjoy your day and your life! To a dog you are an alien that lives forever. Cherish that gift!

Blessings,
Beth

 

 

@2019 Beth Terry Events • All Rights Reserved

How to Write Better Speeches Faster

Need to write a speech?

We have a Live Zoom Meeting or In Person Training for you!

Beth Terry How to Write Better Speeches Faster
We can provide this webinar for an individual or for your own team! Contact us to schedule a training program!

 

Here’s What You’ll Learn

  • How to use The Pearl Framework to create a speech outline in minutes instead of hours.
  • A simple analysis tool to quickly determine what your audience needs to hear.
  • The “Three points and a poem” – an insider’s guide to making your information fresh and memorable.
  • The Seven Questions that will enable you to write a compelling close that moves your audience to act.
  • Three things to remember when using humor in any presentation.
  • A Pro Speaker’s secret to staying on track and avoiding the dreaded tangents
  • A great little tool for staying within your time guidelines, and why you shouldn’t use your cell phone
  • One sentence you can say to yourself before getting on stage that will help allay the jitters.

This webinar was recorded. Click on the link above to go to the information page.

Purchase of this webinar includes:

  • A personalized live recording you can watch unlimited times
  • The PowerPoint slides
  • A template for writing all your speeches
  • A project management form
  • A needs analysis questionnaire to help you form the main points
  • A checklist for running a meeting to make sure it’s a success

Contact us and we’ll set up a program for you on Zoom. It lasts about an hour and we’ll take time for questions. If you sign up for a zoom-inar, you can send your speech ahead of time and Beth will work directly with you on that speech.

See you soon!

Blessings,

Beth

 

 

© 2021 Beth Terry Events • BethTerry.com

Why You Procrastinate and How to Stop

Are you putting off important projects?

@2019 BethTerry.com
Clutter kills creativity!

One of my favorite cartoonists, John Atkinson summed our propensity to procrastinate with this cartoon

Like most people, I wrestle with priorities. These productivity secrets have helped. Each tip focuses on reducing the clutter blocking creativity and motivation.

Some clutter is normal while you’re living your life. There are two kinds of Clutter, though: Denial Clutter and Creative Clutter. The first is an exercise in avoidance. By not addressing the problems, you bury them under mounds of junk that overwhelm and distract you.

Creative Clutter is the mind sorting through the gargantuan puzzle called Life, pulling it together into a beautiful work of Art.

Choose the second. The first will kill you and destroy your soul.

Clutter drains our energy. Piles of magazines and hundreds of knickknacks split our attention and cause us to lose focus. Our peripheral vision busily catalogs all those possessions in case we need them later.

@ 2019 Beth Terry, Clutter
This scene would overwhelm anyone!

Try this: clear your desktop or table. Put all piles and accessories on the floor behind you. Take the one folder you need and place it in front of you. What do you notice? Do you feel an almost instant rise in your energy levels? I felt this when clearing out holiday decorations. I was reluctant to put anything on the newly cleared surfaces. The clean lines, clear spaces, and uncluttered living areas felt much calmer. I may leave it that way. Salvation Army, here I come!

We have cluttered desks, cluttered computer desktops, and cluttered homes. These pile on top of brain clutter: all those things that bounce around in our brains all day and night, keeping us awake. What to do?

Start with your physical environment

Secret 1: De-clutter Your Physical Environment: Gail Blanke’s book “Throw Out 50 Things” was a huge help in getting me started. I love books and every surface is covered in them. Then there’s the collection of goofy souvenirs I picked up along the way. Gail’s book helped me start the sorting process.

Here’s another motivation: in the past few years I’ve helped sort through the estates of four friends who passed away. It’s a sobering reality check when you realize this little statue meant so much to your friend, but to you, it’s just a giraffe gathering dust.

I sorted through my own things as if I were the Executor of my estate. If something means a lot, but it’s in a box in the shed, maybe it’s time to pass it along to someone who’ll treasure it.

Your Brain Needs De-cluttering too!

Secret 2: De-clutter Your Brain — Dump the mental trash. My regular readers know this is my New Year’s Ritual. I play special music (see Secret 3) and get out a yellow pad. Without stopping, I write down everything that’s upsetting me. I write my worries; my self-recriminations; the internal resentment or anger about situations within and without my control.

This ritual started when I was 30. I’ve found relief in seeing these thoughts on paper. Unnamed and unrecognized resentments can make you sick. Airing them out on paper starts the healing process, releasing them through writing. I commit to writing until there’s nothing left to say; nothing left to feel; nothing left to resent.

But I don’t stop there. I may get up and walk the dog; get away from the “trash list” for a bit. Then I sit down again and focus on one item at a time. Seeing this in writing often makes me giggle. Sometimes I cry at how foolish I’ve been. Sometimes it helps me see a solution. I cross out each line and write a positive affirmation or solution in the space below.

When finished, the positive statements are transcribed onto clean paper. Then, outside to the hibachi with the original trash list! I take a deep breath, and forgive myself for my foolishness. I forgive others who may have been listed there as well. This is the process of Forgive and Remember,  not repression. It is finished. Fini. Done. Then I rip the old list to shreds, dropping it into the flames of the hibachi. Enough. Time to move on.

Fatigue comes from cluttered energy

Secret 3: De-clutter your Energy. Imagine if sounds were water. Most of us would drown in the noise surrounding us every day. Since we don’t see it, we adapt to the noise and ignore it. But do we really? Pay attention to the sounds around you. Is the TV on all the time? Is your workplace noisy? Our brains cope by setting it aside, but it’s never gone. As with that stack of papers on your desk, your brain picks up the clutter and uses up precious energy to deal with it. Noisy environments make us tired.

Recently we’ve rediscovered the ancient wisdom of using sound energy at 432Hz and 8Hz as a medium for healing and relaxation. Theories about this vary widely, but I’ve noticed I take deep breaths and feel more creative and relaxed with this music playing. I was challenged with writer’s block today. Then I played this Music to Relax. Within moments I was breathing easier and my brain began churning out ideas to share with you.

If you have pets, here’s a side benefit: when I started playing these harmonies, my very active pup climbed onto my lap and fell asleep!

Listen and see if it works for you. Pachelbel Canon in D is one of the best-known works in 432Hz

To find music that appeals to your tastes, search on 432Hz and you’ll find many options.

Take a little time each day to listen to music that soothes your harried mind. It will do wonders for your ability to get things done. Just as you shower to start your day, this music is like a hot shower for your energy.

To Your Productivity!

Blessings,

 

 

© 2019 BethTerry.com • Beth Terry Events • All Rights Reserved

 

 

What do you need to STOP for the New Year?

Instead of Starting Resolutions – How about knowing what to stop?

@EverybodysLost.com ©BethTerry.com
Sometimes it isn’t what to start, but what to Stop that counts.

Ten days into the new year and people are rushing around starting their New Year’s Resolutions. Friends are eating healthier, the gyms are packed, people with their Fitbits™ are speedwalking past my office as I write this. Is it always about starting? Or is there genius in knowing what to stop?

It’s a heady time, those first weeks of any new year. Everyone is intent upon doing better and being better than last year.

It’s an arbitrary thing, isn’t it? Like I said last post, you can make any day of the year your “New Year.” People going through AA and NarcAnon do it all the time.

How about approaching the rest of the year with a little different focus?

Instead of listing dozens of things you’re resolved to do, focus on three to five things you’ll stop doing. Look with objective eyes at the obstacles in your life. Maybe stop getting in your own way. Maybe stop worrying what others think. You may find a diet is hard, but choosing to stop eating sugar for a month is easier. (I discovered when I stopped sugar and salt for a month I no longer craved them and it was easy to keep that habit going.)

My colleague Marshall Goldsmith did a retrospective several years ago on this idea. If you’re a leader or manager, it’s worth looking at what he has to say. Here’s a short YouTube™ video from him. The essence is quoted above.

Aristotle reminded us more than 2,300 years ago that habits are the most effective pathway to success:

“We are what we repeatedly do.
Excellence, then, is not an act, it’s a habit.”

As you pursue your New Year of excellence and success, what habits will you develop? What can you stop? What can you start? Be gentle with yourself. Don’t make a list of 50 things. Small bites work. Challenge yourself a little at a time. You didn’t develop bad habits all at once. You won’t rid yourself of them all at once.

~~

Try this:

Pull out that list of things to do and see if you can change the wording ~

  1. I will lose 10 pounds by April 15. I will stop eating sugar for one month.
  2. I will get more exercise and walk more. I will stop sitting on the couch watching TV for 3 hours a night and start dancing more.
  3. I will spend 3 hours each morning making calls. I will stop relentlessly checking the news and my emails as a way to avoid making those calls.
  4. I will work with my team to increase productivity this year. I will stop micromanaging my team and trust them to do the work I hired them to do.
  5. I will get into the office one hour earlier this year to get my day started before the others arrive. I will stop making a Starbucks run every morning and wasting my time and money in lines for over-sugared bad coffee. (sorry, Starbucks fans! <grin>)

See how this works? Instead of some flowery resolution that means nothing, you are actively attacking the real problem. It’s not that your people are underproductive, it may be that you are overly involved in the details. It’s not that you need to lose weight, it’s that you might want to rethink your sugar intake.

These are mine… what are yours?  Let me know your New “New Year’s Resolutions!”

And have a wonderful, productive, happy, healthy, prosperous 2019!

Blessings,

 

 

PS – I have openings for three more speech coaching/mentoring clients! Call now! 602-743-9296!

 

©2019 Beth Terry Events • All Rights Reserved • May be shared with attribution

What do you need to STOP for the New Year?

Instead of Starting Resolutions – How about knowing what to stop?

@EverybodysLost.com ©BethTerry.com
Sometimes it isn’t what to start, but what to Stop that counts.

Ten days into the new year and people are rushing around starting their New Year’s Resolutions. Friends are eating healthier, the gyms are packed, people with their Fitbits™ are speedwalking past my office as I write this. Is it always about starting? Or is there genius in knowing what to stop?

It’s a heady time, those first weeks of any new year. Everyone is intent upon doing better and being better than last year.

It’s an arbitrary thing, isn’t it? Like I said last post, you can make any day of the year your “New Year.” People going through AA and NarcAnon do it all the time.

How about approaching the rest of the year with a little different focus?

Instead of listing dozens of things you’re resolved to do, focus on three to five things you’ll stop doing. Look with objective eyes at the obstacles in your life. Maybe stop getting in your own way. Maybe stop worrying what others think. You may find a diet is hard, but choosing to stop eating sugar for a month is easier. (I discovered when I stopped sugar and salt for a month I no longer craved them and it was easy to keep that habit going.)

My colleague Marshall Goldsmith did a retrospective several years ago on this idea. If you’re a leader or manager, it’s worth looking at what he has to say. Here’s a short YouTube™ video from him. The essence is quoted above.

Aristotle reminded us more than 2,300 years ago that habits are the most effective pathway to success:

“We are what we repeatedly do.
Excellence, then, is not an act, it’s a habit.”

As you pursue your New Year of excellence and success, what habits will you develop? What can you stop? What can you start? Be gentle with yourself. Don’t make a list of 50 things. Small bites work. Challenge yourself a little at a time. You didn’t develop bad habits all at once. You won’t rid yourself of them all at once.

~~

Try this:

Pull out that list of things to do and see if you can change the wording ~

  1. I will lose 10 pounds by April 15. I will stop eating sugar for one month.
  2. I will get more exercise and walk more. I will stop sitting on the couch watching TV for 3 hours a night and start dancing more.
  3. I will spend 3 hours each morning making calls. I will stop relentlessly checking the news and my emails as a way to avoid making those calls.
  4. I will work with my team to increase productivity this year. I will stop micromanaging my team and trust them to do the work I hired them to do.
  5. I will get into the office one hour earlier this year to get my day started before the others arrive. I will stop making a Starbucks run every morning and wasting my time and money in lines for over-sugared bad coffee. (sorry, Starbucks fans! <grin>)

See how this works? Instead of some flowery resolution that means nothing, you are actively attacking the real problem. It’s not that your people are underproductive, it may be that you are overly involved in the details. It’s not that you need to lose weight, it’s that you might want to rethink your sugar intake.

These are mine… what are yours?  Let me know your New “New Year’s Resolutions!”

And have a wonderful, productive, happy, healthy, prosperous 2019!

Blessings,

 

 

PS – I have openings for three more speech coaching/mentoring clients! Call now! 602-743-9296!

 

©2019 Beth Terry Events • All Rights Reserved • May be shared with attribution

What do you need to STOP for the New Year?

Instead of Starting Resolutions – How about knowing what to stop?

@EverybodysLost.com ©BethTerry.com
Sometimes it isn’t what to start, but what to Stop that counts.

Ten days into the new year and people are rushing around starting their New Year’s Resolutions. Friends are eating healthier, the gyms are packed, people with their Fitbits™ are speedwalking past my office as I write this. Is it always about starting? Or is there genius in knowing what to stop?

It’s a heady time, those first weeks of any new year. Everyone is intent upon doing better and being better than last year.

It’s an arbitrary thing, isn’t it? Like I said last post, you can make any day of the year your “New Year.” People going through AA and NarcAnon do it all the time.

How about approaching the rest of the year with a little different focus?

Instead of listing dozens of things you’re resolved to do, focus on three to five things you’ll stop doing. Look with objective eyes at the obstacles in your life. Maybe stop getting in your own way. Maybe stop worrying what others think. You may find a diet is hard, but choosing to stop eating sugar for a month is easier. (I discovered when I stopped sugar and salt for a month I no longer craved them and it was easy to keep that habit going.)

My colleague Marshall Goldsmith did a retrospective several years ago on this idea. If you’re a leader or manager, it’s worth looking at what he has to say. Here’s a short YouTube™ video from him. The essence is quoted above.

Aristotle reminded us more than 2,300 years ago that habits are the most effective pathway to success:

“We are what we repeatedly do.
Excellence, then, is not an act, it’s a habit.”

As you pursue your New Year of excellence and success, what habits will you develop? What can you stop? What can you start? Be gentle with yourself. Don’t make a list of 50 things. Small bites work. Challenge yourself a little at a time. You didn’t develop bad habits all at once. You won’t rid yourself of them all at once.

~~

Try this:

Pull out that list of things to do and see if you can change the wording ~

  1. I will lose 10 pounds by April 15. I will stop eating sugar for one month.
  2. I will get more exercise and walk more. I will stop sitting on the couch watching TV for 3 hours a night and start dancing more.
  3. I will spend 3 hours each morning making calls. I will stop relentlessly checking the news and my emails as a way to avoid making those calls.
  4. I will work with my team to increase productivity this year. I will stop micromanaging my team and trust them to do the work I hired them to do.
  5. I will get into the office one hour earlier this year to get my day started before the others arrive. I will stop making a Starbucks run every morning and wasting my time and money in lines for over-sugared bad coffee. (sorry, Starbucks fans! <grin>)

See how this works? Instead of some flowery resolution that means nothing, you are actively attacking the real problem. It’s not that your people are underproductive, it may be that you are overly involved in the details. It’s not that you need to lose weight, it’s that you might want to rethink your sugar intake.

These are mine… what are yours?  Let me know your New “New Year’s Resolutions!”

And have a wonderful, productive, happy, healthy, prosperous 2019!

Blessings,

 

 

PS – I have openings for three more speech coaching/mentoring clients! Call now! 602-743-9296!

 

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