Beth Terry, CSP

Letting Go

Posted on September 6, 2015 by Beth Terry — No Comments ↓

Saying Goodbye

Rainbow Seattle — Letting Go is Not the end of the world, Just the end of this Rainbow

Why do we insist on holding on to things that no longer work for us? We’ve all seen it with our friends and we’ve all done it. We mourn lost relationships as if they are the only relationship we will ever have in our lifetime. Sometimes people come along to help us with some aspect of our lives. Maybe we needed to learn to be loved. Maybe we needed to learn to be independent. Or we needed to understand finance, family, love, friendship, or even letting go.

Each of us has a responsibility to ourselves to become the best version of ourselves we can be. That sometimes means moving on when we want to hold on. Yes – there are times to fight for a friendship or a relationship. Only you know. Just don’t hold on so long that you hurt yourself and miss the person who has been waiting in the wings for you to be ready for them.

It’s your life. Make some healthy decisions for your now and for your future.

Cheers,

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved

Turtles all the way down – Not the Big Bang!

Posted on September 4, 2015 by Beth Terry — No Comments ↓

There are many versions of the “turtles” story. Here’s one of them:

Patti's desert Tortoise pic with baby — Desert Tortoise

Dr. William James, who is known as the Father of American Psychology, used to talk in his logic lectures about the impossibility of swaying someone from their distinct and strongly held Belief Systems. His example was a conversation he had with an old woman. This ancient philosopher had an explanation of how the world was created. She said the Big Bang Theory was wrong, and all those Darwinians and Creationists were just crazy talking.

What was her explanation? She explained how the Earth rested on the back of a ginormous turtle.

“But, dear lady”, Professor James protested, as politely as could be, “what holds up the turtle?”

“Ah”, she said, “that’s easy. The turtle is standing on the back of another turtle.”

“OK, I see”, said Professor James, still being polite. “But would you be so good as to tell me what holds up the second turtle?”

“It’s no use, Professor”, said the old woman, not falling into his logical trap.

“It’s turtles-turtles-turtles, all the way down!”

I didn’t get it till I visited my brother and sister-in-law. They raise rescued Sulcata and Desert Tortoises. I took the above picture but didn’t see that the mama was carrying one of her babies on her back. When I looked closer at this photo, I realized, “HEY! I’ve got the beginning of a new planet! Turtles all the way down!”

It’s Friday, go take a break and tip back an adult beverage in honor of the Turtles… all the way down!

Cheers,

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved

Problems Are the Wind in Your Sails

Posted on September 2, 2015 by Beth Terry — No Comments ↓

Problems are the reason you were hired

Problems Are Wind — Problems are the Wind in Your Sails that keep you employed and employable.

Here’s your job description: SOLVE PROBLEMS. Everyone’s job is to solve a problem. Most people hate problems at work. Yet without them, you wouldn’t have a job. Your JOB is to solve the problems you were hired to solve. When you were interviewed, didn’t they ask you: can you fix this? can you do this? can you analyze this? All of those are PROBLEM SOLVING ACTIVITIES. How cool is that?

Think about it — Why else are you here? Why do you think you got your job? Even if you work at Mickey Dees, when you ask, “Would you like fries with that?” You are helping the customer AND McDonalds solve a problem. You solve the customers hunger and impulse problem and you solve McDonalds’ problem that it has food to sell and needs people to give them money for it.

Here’s the deal: if you think of your job as “solving problems,” then you won’t get so upset when they come up. Just think of them as Job Security! And you will realize one of the great secrets in Life… you aren’t all that different from the Corporate President or anyone else. All they do all day is solve problems, too!

Cheers,

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved

Life is Not a Straight Line

Posted on August 27, 2015 by Beth Terry — No Comments ↓

Life is Not a Straight Line

Life takes some pretty interesting dips and turns as you age, if you are lucky enough to age. Just because you are successful today doesn’t mean you will be in 5 years. Just because you are healthy right now doesn’t guarantee you will be healthy forever. The reverse is true as well. If things don’t seem to be going your way, nothing says it will always be like this.

That’s the beauty of the Resilience of the Human Spirit. You can and you will bounce back. Your choices matter, so if your life sucks, start making new and different choices. As Albert Einstein famously said,

“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

Experience teaches us all that Life can change on a dime. Ask the girl who was texting and driving. She ran up onto the curve, hit another car, nearly killed someone else and found herself in the hospital for a year. All for typing, ‘OMG’ on her phone while piloting a 4,000 pound vehicle down a city street.

It’s very easy to believe you are immortal and things only happen to other people. Remember: life can change in an instant. This is a reminder to make better life choices for yourself.

Cheers,

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved

Choose Wisely

Posted on August 27, 2015 by Beth Terry — No Comments ↓

Choose Wisely

: Choose Wisely!

Choose wisely. Your choices matter more than you realize. As you get older, you become the product of every choice you have ever made. Be mindful and don’t take life for granted

As we age we find ourselves regretting some of our earlier choices. Over a glass of wine or coffee, we commiserate with our friends: “If only I had bought this stock or that mutual fund.” “If only I had known the damage this or that bad habit would do to me in my 50’s.” We have 20/20 hindsight, as they say. We can see a little further down the path behind us and become more mindful about the Choices we make going forward.

If we could only go back in a Time Machine and re-make some of those choices. When Millenials grumble about old-timers (which, to most of them, are people over age 30!) They miss an important point. Just as a 25 year old can give solid advice to someone in High School or Grade School, so can a person decades older than them give them some perspective on the choices they are making.

No one has all the right answers. Some of us have the benefit of a few more miles and experiences we can share. It’s always good to collaborate. If the generations would listen to each other, we could teach each other a lot.

Cheers,

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved

Choose Wisely

Posted on August 27, 2015 by Beth Terry — No Comments ↓

Choose Wisely

: Choose Wisely!

Choose wisely. Your choices matter more than you realize. As you get older, you become the product of every choice you have ever made. Be mindful and don’t take life for granted

Cheers,

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved

Forgive & Remember

Posted on August 27, 2015 by Beth Terry — 9 Comments ↓

Forgive and Remember

Forgiveness isn’t about letting someone “get away with it.” It’s about letting you have an open place in your heart and your life so you can get on with it. People can be real jerks. People make mistakes. You have been a jerk and made mistakes in the past. The only way you can get on with it is for you to forgive yourself, ask for forgiveness, then be someone who forgives.

The Remember part is important though. I’m not saying to bury it. I’m not saying some people shouldn’t reap the consequences of their actions. Remember how that person treated you. Remember how they acted and what they did. You might have to testify!! 🙂 You also need to remember so you can keep them at arms length, understanding they may do this again. It’s OK to be wary of the behaviors of some people. Just don’t go carrying it around with you so that it cripples you.

Cheers,

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved

Secret to Successful Relationships

Posted on August 21, 2015 by Beth Terry — No Comments ↓

Secret to Successful Relationships

work with people where they are — Work with people where they areWork with people where they are, not where you want them to be.

As I struggled to learn how to be a manager, mom, girlfriend and then wife, Dad gave me this advice: the secret to successful relationships is to stop trying to make people live up to your idea of who they are. Try this: be with them in their current state. Start where they are instead of trying to take them on a journey made up of your own goals.

Try this old trick —

Write your name as fast as you can three times.

Now switch hands and write your name as fast as you can three times with that hand.

Notice that your handwriting looks like a Doctor’s Prescription? Why is that? It’s because it is natural and normal for you to use your dominant hand. I just asked you to do something that is not natural and normal for you. Your brain is hardwired to use one hand. Notice how you felt when you were trying to write. If it was easy for you, then you have a different talent than most. Most people aren’t ambidextrous. I’ve seen people stick their tongues out trying to write with their non-dominant hand when I do this exercise. I write backwards when I try it!

So here I was trying to change how you write and you couldn’t do it. If you can’t even write with a different hand, how do you expect other people to change a lifetime of habits and thoughts just because you said they should?

People aren’t going to change because it’s convenient for you. They will change when they are damn good and ready to change. You may be able to assist them if they are ready. But only when they are ready. Meanwhile, if you love them the way they are and work from that point, they may give you the same courtesy and accept you the way you are. It’s all give and take.

Cheers,

The Real Secret of Success

Posted on August 21, 2015 by Beth Terry — No Comments ↓

Market yourself to yourself…

The Real Secret of Success is to Market Yourself to Yourself

The secret of success is to remember that you matter. When you believe in yourself you are far more marketable and authentic.

If you don’t believe in yourself, then who will? How will you get up in the morning and motivate yourself to get out and fulfill your dreams and your potential? It’s easy to forget that we can positively impact the lives of others. It’s easy to get so wound up in our own troubles and our own mental myths that we don’t understand that we are missed and our smile is needed out in the world. Get up tomorrow morning and resolve to share a little more of yourself with the people who love you.

Notice how you react when you talk with someone who just doesn’t feel authentic. You aren’t motivated to work with them, are you? What your subconscious mind is telling you is that they don’t believe in themselves. If they don’t, why should you? Work on this within yourself and see your successes soar.

Cheers,

Remember Who You Are

Posted on August 21, 2015 by Beth Terry — No Comments ↓

Remember who you are

We are bombarded daily with images and messages telling us to be someone we aren’t. We are told to fear judgments from other people: “There might be retribution, there might be consequences, don’t be quirky, don’t be different, wait… be different — but not too different… oh don’t be THAT. Be unique but don’t make me uncomfortable. OK, I want you to be just like ME, not like YOU!”

Take a step back. Define yourself, baby. Define yourself. You only get so many rotations on this spinning green planet. Don’t lie on your deathbed wondering what happened and regretting your life choices. Live your life while you are alive!

A pastor at the Kailua, Hawaii Unity church once said something profound. I quote him when someone starts telling me who I am. I smile sweetly and say, “If I am living my life, and you are living my life… then who is living your life?” It works like a charm.

Cheers,