That Pesky Problem: Can You Save The World?

Can you save the world? Prolly not…

©2015 Beth Terry Plant your garden
It’s tempting to look outside at the world and try to save that before we look in the mirror and save ourselves.

The problem with saving the world is that it is made up of people, 7 billion people, all in different stages of mental clarity (or not). And they really don’t think they need you to save them.

I was talking with a young woman in her late 20’s who declared (with raised chin and flaring nostrils) that her entire life’s purpose was “To Save the World.” A noble cause, I would suppose, but impractical and unrealistic, not to mention a tad arrogant.

First, it’s hard to save something that doesn’t apparently want to be saved. I was reminded of earlier missionary excursions to the far-flung islands of the Pacific. As the joke in Hawaii goes, “The missionaries came to do good, and they did very well…”

Second, what exactly does it mean to save the world? It means you think you and your ways are better than theirs. Maybe. Maybe not.

I asked her if she had ever traveled to these far flung places she was going to save. Turned out she hadn’t even been out of Arizona except for a brief vacation in Rocky Point, Mexico. I suggested she take a few long trips to the places she wanted to save, and maybe read the CIA Factbook before she left.

Shortly after our conversation, I spent an afternoon at the Musical Instrument Museum. This marvelous collection of world music and history is a reminder how we earthlings are both very much the same, and also very different. I made a mental note to recommend it to her. (Not to be missed if you ever visit Phoenix.)

So what do you think? Can we “Save the world?” What does that mean? IMHO if we can’t even stop ourselves from eating that last Danish, or chowing down on Thanksgiving dinner till we burst, how do we think we are qualified to tell anyone else how to live out those 26,000 days each of us is allotted (give or take…)

Maybe the Life Purpose we should all dedicate ourselves to is saving our own lives. Achieving that is a noble goal and allows us to provide love and support (not be a savior) to those around us.

I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Cheers!

Beth Terry

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved

That Pesky Problem: Can You Save The World?

Can you save the world? Prolly not…

©2015 Beth Terry Plant your garden
It’s tempting to look outside at the world and try to save that before we look in the mirror and save ourselves.

The problem with saving the world is that it is made up of people, 7 billion people, all in different stages of mental clarity (or not). And they really don’t think they need you to save them.

I was talking with a young woman in her late 20’s who declared (with raised chin and flaring nostrils) that her entire life’s purpose was “To Save the World.” A noble cause, I would suppose, but impractical and unrealistic, not to mention a tad arrogant.

First, it’s hard to save something that doesn’t apparently want to be saved. I was reminded of earlier missionary excursions to the far-flung islands of the Pacific. As the joke in Hawaii goes, “The missionaries came to do good, and they did very well…”

Second, what exactly does it mean to save the world? It means you think you and your ways are better than theirs. Maybe. Maybe not.

I asked her if she had ever traveled to these far flung places she was going to save. Turned out she hadn’t even been out of Arizona except for a brief vacation in Rocky Point, Mexico. I suggested she take a few long trips to the places she wanted to save, and maybe read the CIA Factbook before she left.

Shortly after our conversation, I spent an afternoon at the Musical Instrument Museum. This marvelous collection of world music and history is a reminder how we earthlings are both very much the same, and also very different. I made a mental note to recommend it to her. (Not to be missed if you ever visit Phoenix.)

So what do you think? Can we “Save the world?” What does that mean? IMHO if we can’t even stop ourselves from eating that last Danish, or chowing down on Thanksgiving dinner till we burst, how do we think we are qualified to tell anyone else how to live out those 26,000 days each of us is allotted (give or take…)

Maybe the Life Purpose we should all dedicate ourselves to is saving our own lives. Achieving that is a noble goal and allows us to provide love and support (not be a savior) to those around us.

I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Cheers!

Beth Terry

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved

Can You Afford NOT to De-Stress?

Psssst… you’re no fun when you are stressed out!

Stress
Practice Daily De-Stressing to stay healthy

Face it, we’re all kind of a PITA (pain :-)) when we are stressed. We push people around; we aren’t ourselves; the more stressed we are the more frazzled we become. It’s not good for us and it really messes with our friendships and relationships at work and at home. Not to mention that our productivity takes a dive.

And for what? Sure, it’s great to have a mission and purpose. Not so great if you leave us prematurely due to stress!

So – here are Six Life Hacks to help you De-Stress

  1. Stretch… a LOT:
    • Before you get out of bed in the morning, do a few quick stretches. Legs straight in the air and cross over from side to side; the bicycle routine; knees to chest; knees together then rock from side to side. This gets the blood flowing, works out kinks and is a shot of energy for the day.
    • At your desk, clasp your hands together in the old “here’s the church and here’s the steeple” style. Press them straight out in front of you and then straight up over your head. Roll your shoulders to the front and back. Hold your arms out straight with your palms straight up then rotate them with palms towards the floor. Clap your hands behind you with arms as straight as possible.
    • While seated, lift each leg up off the chair, first with knees bent and then with legs as straight as possible. If you do these two little rituals daily, you will feel less stressed, more energized and better able to tackle the day. (Hah! you just did all those! I know you did! See?!)
  1. Happy Feet Keep You Stable:  When I worked at a Personnel Recruitment office in Hawaii, a very staid and proper man (or so I thought) was one of the Recruiters. One day I spotted bare, wet feet resting on a towel peeking out from under his desk. He was one of those lunch-time surfers. But on the days he couldn’t get to the beach, he’d pull a small pan of saltwater from the corner under his desk and quietly slip off his socks and shoes to soak his feet for half an hour. When I finally got up the nerve to ask him, he said it was a great stress reliever and felt like he was in the ocean. I started trying that during the day and it really works! If not at work, do it once you get home.
© BethTerry.com EverybodysLost.com
Watching Hummingbirds is very relaxing
  1. Nature breaks the Stress:
    • Take a walk outside… but if you can’t go outside, do a quick search on nature cams and watch it or play it in the background for a short break. I like the Eagle Cams, Owl cams and hummingbird cams. Ustream.tv is a great resource.
    • Hummingbirds visit my patio in Arizona year round. So far I’ve had three nests and watched six babies fledge. The picture above was taken from my dining room window. They chose a tiny windchime for the base of the nest. That nest is smaller than a ping-pong ball cut in half!
    • Get out of the office during your break or lunch. Bring a sandwich and sit in the park away from the noise and mayhem.
    • Or bring nature to you – have a live plant, a fishbowl, or headphones with soothing sounds of the surf or a babbling brook.
    • Whatever floats your boat – find something to do with nature that will soothe you.
  1. Rituals are soothing: Rituals and traditions can be very grounding.
    • As teens and twenty-somethings, many of us rejected the traditions of our parents.
    • As we age, we realize that traditions can anchor us and keep us stable
    • Create healthy exercise and pre-sleep rituals
    • Try a safety ritual before bed – checking all the doors, looking in on the kids, making sure the garage door is closed
    • Short meditation rituals remind you to slow down and breathe, look around, be present
    • Reminder Rituals: Each time the clock reads either 11:11 or 1:11, I stop for a full minute and remember all the things I’m grateful for.
    • I do my Gratitudes: “10 things I’m grateful for”  each morning before getting out of bed.

Each morning before getting out of bed, I list my Gratitudes

  1. Sleep Better: Turn off bright lights, video games, emails, news programs, TV… at least 90 minutes before bed. What you put in your brain before sleep impacts your dream state, even if you don’t remember. I watched an episode of Twinning on Hulu just before bed one night and woke up stressed and upset that my twin (I don’t have a twin) was living apart from me.
  1. Stop-Drop-Breathe:  Right now consciously lower your shoulders, get that head directly over your spine, tuck in your butt so your spine is aligned. Even if you do this only occasionally, you’ll notice your back and legs don’t hurt so much, your stress levels drop almost immediately, and it’s easier to breathe.

Take care of yourself! We need you healthy!

Relax! Thanks for listening!

Beth Terry

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved

Can You Afford NOT to De-Stress?

Psssst… you’re no fun when you are stressed out!

Stress
Practice Daily De-Stressing to stay healthy

Face it, we’re all kind of a PITA (pain :-)) when we are stressed. We push people around; we aren’t ourselves; the more stressed we are the more frazzled we become. It’s not good for us and it really messes with our friendships and relationships at work and at home. Not to mention that our productivity takes a dive.

And for what? Sure, it’s great to have a mission and purpose. Not so great if you leave us prematurely due to stress!

So – here are Six Life Hacks to help you De-Stress

  1. Stretch… a LOT:
    • Before you get out of bed in the morning, do a few quick stretches. Legs straight in the air and cross over from side to side; the bicycle routine; knees to chest; knees together then rock from side to side. This gets the blood flowing, works out kinks and is a shot of energy for the day.
    • At your desk, clasp your hands together in the old “here’s the church and here’s the steeple” style. Press them straight out in front of you and then straight up over your head. Roll your shoulders to the front and back. Hold your arms out straight with your palms straight up then rotate them with palms towards the floor. Clap your hands behind you with arms as straight as possible.
    • While seated, lift each leg up off the chair, first with knees bent and then with legs as straight as possible. If you do these two little rituals daily, you will feel less stressed, more energized and better able to tackle the day. (Hah! you just did all those! I know you did! See?!)
  1. Happy Feet Keep You Stable:  When I worked at a Personnel Recruitment office in Hawaii, a very staid and proper man (or so I thought) was one of the Recruiters. One day I spotted bare, wet feet resting on a towel peeking out from under his desk. He was one of those lunch-time surfers. But on the days he couldn’t get to the beach, he’d pull a small pan of saltwater from the corner under his desk and quietly slip off his socks and shoes to soak his feet for half an hour. When I finally got up the nerve to ask him, he said it was a great stress reliever and felt like he was in the ocean. I started trying that during the day and it really works! If not at work, do it once you get home.
© BethTerry.com EverybodysLost.com
Watching Hummingbirds is very relaxing
  1. Nature breaks the Stress:
    • Take a walk outside… but if you can’t go outside, do a quick search on nature cams and watch it or play it in the background for a short break. I like the Eagle Cams, Owl cams and hummingbird cams. Ustream.tv is a great resource.
    • Hummingbirds visit my patio in Arizona year round. So far I’ve had three nests and watched six babies fledge. The picture above was taken from my dining room window. They chose a tiny windchime for the base of the nest. That nest is smaller than a ping-pong ball cut in half!
    • Get out of the office during your break or lunch. Bring a sandwich and sit in the park away from the noise and mayhem.
    • Or bring nature to you – have a live plant, a fishbowl, or headphones with soothing sounds of the surf or a babbling brook.
    • Whatever floats your boat – find something to do with nature that will soothe you.
  1. Rituals are soothing: Rituals and traditions can be very grounding.
    • As teens and twenty-somethings, many of us rejected the traditions of our parents.
    • As we age, we realize that traditions can anchor us and keep us stable
    • Create healthy exercise and pre-sleep rituals
    • Try a safety ritual before bed – checking all the doors, looking in on the kids, making sure the garage door is closed
    • Short meditation rituals remind you to slow down and breathe, look around, be present
    • Reminder Rituals: Each time the clock reads either 11:11 or 1:11, I stop for a full minute and remember all the things I’m grateful for.
    • I do my Gratitudes: “10 things I’m grateful for”  each morning before getting out of bed.

Each morning before getting out of bed, I list my Gratitudes

  1. Sleep Better: Turn off bright lights, video games, emails, news programs, TV… at least 90 minutes before bed. What you put in your brain before sleep impacts your dream state, even if you don’t remember. I watched an episode of Twinning on Hulu just before bed one night and woke up stressed and upset that my twin (I don’t have a twin) was living apart from me.
  1. Stop-Drop-Breathe:  Right now consciously lower your shoulders, get that head directly over your spine, tuck in your butt so your spine is aligned. Even if you do this only occasionally, you’ll notice your back and legs don’t hurt so much, your stress levels drop almost immediately, and it’s easier to breathe.

Take care of yourself! We need you healthy!

Relax! Thanks for listening!

Beth Terry

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved

Garth Brooks Connects in Phoenix!

It was a wild and wonderful crowd @TalkingStickArena

I love country music because the lyrics are easy to understand and you can sing along. Sing along they did – all 17,000+ fans at the Talking Stick Arena on Saturday night when Garth Brooks brought his high energy concert to Phoenix. We were lucky: there was no second show that night, so Garth Brooks, Trisha Yearwood and the band had the next several days off. Our concert ended around 10:45 and the crowd wanted more!

We had great seats eight rows up behind the stage. At a Garth Brooks concert, there are no bad seats. He and his crew run around the whole stage all night, with their antics projected onto giant screens visible from every angle. We were on our feet for the whole concert, laughing, stomping, singing along, crying when a cowboy proposed on the big screen to his cowgirl… it was a memorable evening.

Garth Brooks hasn’t been to Phoenix in 17 years. The audience was hungry and they got what they paid for. If you’re a Boomer like me, you remember how we used to click on our lighters to show appreciation. It’s now updated to lighting up your cell phone flashlight. Here’s what it looked like:

© 2015 Beth Terry, Garth Brooks concert
The audience was on their feet all night at the Garth Brooks concert

As a singer, you know you’ve hit a home run when the audience knows all the words. On several occasions, Garth and Trisha stopped singing and let the fans take it away. Hearing 17,000 people singing together and swaying to the music gave me chicken-skin (as we say in Hawaii.) It was connection: tangible evidence of the resilience of the human spirit. We were all in this together and, for a moment, there were no differences. *

From my catseat I could see this was not just a regular “redneck” crowd (whatever that is.) There were Baby Boomers, Millenials, and Gen X’ers. There were people of all races. There were rockers in ripped shirts, George Strait cowboys rockin’ black cowboy hats, and bandana-wearing bikers with tats; there were folks all dressed up who looked like they came from church. We had cute little cowgirls in tiny shorts rockin’ high heel cowboy boots, and the Millenial guys smart enough to be there and watch them. 😉 I even saw a couple of burkas.

Garth Brooks and his wife Trisha Yearwood define “crossover music.” If you like to sing along to music that makes your day, this is one to check out. She has always been a favorite of mine; I originally wanted to go because she would be there. I love watching them sing together.

© 2015 Beth Terry, Everybodyslost.com
Garth Brooks & Trisha Yearwood sing a duet in Phoenix

You still have next weekend in Phoenix to see this show. They will be in Utah, California and Kansas next. Here’s the Tour information

Happy Connecting! I hope you get to see this!

Cheers!

Beth Terry

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved
  • [I wanted to show you a 30 second clip of that, but got my hand slapped. Sorry about that! I thought since he wasn’t singing but 17,000 people were it would be ok…]

 

 

Yesterday Ended Last Night for the Cubs

Congratulations Cubs for ending a 109 year streak!

Cubs Play Padres
Cubs Play Padres at Spring Training in AZ, March 2015

Spring Training in Arizona is a big deal. Games are being played all over the Phoenix Valley, signaling the beginning of weeks of excitement and “batter up!” The smell of the popcorn, the sunny days sitting out at the fields playing hooky from work, and the sound of the bat cracking the ball bring back memories from childhood. We scour the internet for tickets every year.

While watching the the Cubs play the Padres, my friend correctly predicted, “The Cubs could go all the way this year. You should take a picture of this game. They’re awesome already.” So there’s the picture above, my little cellphone snapshot of a team well on it’s way to breaking records.

Baseball is the quintessential American sport, and one of the best ways to watch real Team Spirit in action. We’ve all heard it before, but the Cubs put Team Psychology 101 into practice and it paid off. Last night you could see they worked it from the farm teams to the dugout to coaching styles: In essence, all the players and managers said, “We don’t quit, we tell them it’s time to step it up, we tell them we believe in them, we know we can do it. We have a great team.” 

When anyone believes in you that much, it makes it so much easier to do the job right!

That’s a great reminder for all Managers!
Cubs Win at Wrigley Field! Watch here

One of the fans held up a sign that said, “No More Next Year!” That sums it up. This was a long time coming and a well deserved reward for what appears to be a solid team strategy from the top down.

Congratulations Cubs! It will be fun to watch you this year!

Cheers!

Beth Terry

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved

 

How Do You Impact People?

Even when you don’t realize it

© 2015 Beth Terry, EverybodysLost.com
You impact people more than you realize

Never mind all the new evidence about how we leave bits of our biological aura on people as we pass by them. We impact people just with our presence. Most of us aren’t aware of what’s called our “resting face.” That’s the look you have on your face when you think no one is watching. Yet others see your expression and it subtly changes their mood. I’ve seen this type of reflection happen in conversation. I’m an animated storyteller and have noticed times when I’m deep into a funny story that the person listening suddenly copies my expressions.

There was a book in the early 90’s called Emotional Contagion. The research showed humans will synchronize facial expressions with others as a way of connecting. (This is why some older married couples look alike! They’ve been copying each others’ expressions so long their faces stuck that way!) Once you change your facial expression, you’re sending messages to the rest of your body that influence how you feel. Thus the advice, “Fake it till you make it.”

Try it – sit up straight, pull your shoulders down and back. Then grin. Notice how that simple act will cause you to relax and feel slightly better. Now, slump forward, squint your eyes and glare at the screen.  Notice again how that has changed your body subtly, and not in a good way.

Take this a step further: Why do some people get better service than others? Why do some people seem to have all the luck? Why did some students in your school do better with one teacher and not with another? Why do some guys/girls get all the attention at a club? Pay Attention. Is their “resting face” friendlier than most? Do they inspire other people to smile more? I’m writing a dating book and I’ve noticed when people can make someone smile and laugh, they have a higher chance of meeting/dancing with/ dating that person.

You Impact People. Your facial expression, your moods, your energy and the look on your “resting face” change how the people around you feel about you and about themselves. We change people just by being in their space (or on TV, or in a movie…) Thus my quote from my favorite 1970’s poet, Laurence Craig Greene. “They come, they go, they never know what they do… but they do change you.” And you change them. We can’t help it. We’re social creatures.

So – if your life just isn’t working right now, try dropping those shoulders and find something to smile about. Take a break and get your focus back. Give those sourpusses in your life a wide berth. Don’t spend too much time with them. (And don’t be one of them!) Better yet, find someone who makes you laugh. It’s good for your blood pressure and it makes this crazy world just a tiny bit better for all of us.

Cheers! SMILE!

Beth Terry

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved

 

How Do You Impact People?

Even when you don’t realize it

© 2015 Beth Terry, EverybodysLost.com
You impact people more than you realize

Never mind all the new evidence about how we leave bits of our biological aura on people as we pass by them. We impact people just with our presence. Most of us aren’t aware of what’s called our “resting face.” That’s the look you have on your face when you think no one is watching. Yet others see your expression and it subtly changes their mood. I’ve seen this type of reflection happen in conversation. I’m an animated storyteller and have noticed times when I’m deep into a funny story that the person listening suddenly copies my expressions.

There was a book in the early 90’s called Emotional Contagion. The research showed humans will synchronize facial expressions with others as a way of connecting. (This is why some older married couples look alike! They’ve been copying each others’ expressions so long their faces stuck that way!) Once you change your facial expression, you’re sending messages to the rest of your body that influence how you feel. Thus the advice, “Fake it till you make it.”

Try it – sit up straight, pull your shoulders down and back. Then grin. Notice how that simple act will cause you to relax and feel slightly better. Now, slump forward, squint your eyes and glare at the screen.  Notice again how that has changed your body subtly, and not in a good way.

Take this a step further: Why do some people get better service than others? Why do some people seem to have all the luck? Why did some students in your school do better with one teacher and not with another? Why do some guys/girls get all the attention at a club? Pay Attention. Is their “resting face” friendlier than most? Do they inspire other people to smile more? I’m writing a dating book and I’ve noticed when people can make someone smile and laugh, they have a higher chance of meeting/dancing with/ dating that person.

You Impact People. Your facial expression, your moods, your energy and the look on your “resting face” change how the people around you feel about you and about themselves. We change people just by being in their space (or on TV, or in a movie…) Thus my quote from my favorite 1970’s poet, Laurence Craig Greene. “They come, they go, they never know what they do… but they do change you.” And you change them. We can’t help it. We’re social creatures.

So – if your life just isn’t working right now, try dropping those shoulders and find something to smile about. Take a break and get your focus back. Give those sourpusses in your life a wide berth. Don’t spend too much time with them. (And don’t be one of them!) Better yet, find someone who makes you laugh. It’s good for your blood pressure and it makes this crazy world just a tiny bit better for all of us.

Cheers! SMILE!

Beth Terry

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved

 

Never thought about that… Life happens in moments

Life goes on within you and without you

© 2015 Beth Terry • Life goes on
Life goes on within you and without you

In this moment life is happening all over the world to other people. Your life is both better and worse than theirs. The best thing you can do is live your life the best you know how.

~ In this moment… A new life came into the world

Somewhere else a family found out a loved one has left the planet

~ In this moment… Someone got down on one knee and asked for a hand in marriage

Somewhere else someone tearfully handed a spouse divorce papers

~ In this moment… Someone’s cancer went into remission

Somewhere else someone found out their cancer is terminal

~ In this moment … Parents watched their 5 year old walk into school for the first time

Somewhere else parents stood proudly watching their college student receive a diploma

~ In this moment someone was arrested

Somewhere else someone finished a jail sentence and headed out to a new chance at life

~~~

In each moment there are endings and beginnings happening somewhere. Whether you are at a beginning, an ending, or somewhere in the middle, hang on. Life is always and forever changing.

There will always be people better off and worse off than you.

In this moment, celebrate where you are. Make the most of your life, and learn something. One of my favorite singers, Laura Bell Bundy sang it best:

“I worry about where I am, not where I’m not.”

Be Happy,

Beth Terry

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved

 

Never thought about that… Life happens in moments

Life goes on within you and without you

© 2015 Beth Terry • Life goes on
Life goes on within you and without you

In this moment life is happening all over the world to other people. Your life is both better and worse than theirs. The best thing you can do is live your life the best you know how.

~ In this moment… A new life came into the world

Somewhere else a family found out a loved one has left the planet

~ In this moment… Someone got down on one knee and asked for a hand in marriage

Somewhere else someone tearfully handed a spouse divorce papers

~ In this moment… Someone’s cancer went into remission

Somewhere else someone found out their cancer is terminal

~ In this moment … Parents watched their 5 year old walk into school for the first time

Somewhere else parents stood proudly watching their college student receive a diploma

~ In this moment someone was arrested

Somewhere else someone finished a jail sentence and headed out to a new chance at life

~~~

In each moment there are endings and beginnings happening somewhere. Whether you are at a beginning, an ending, or somewhere in the middle, hang on. Life is always and forever changing.

There will always be people better off and worse off than you.

In this moment, celebrate where you are. Make the most of your life, and learn something. One of my favorite singers, Laura Bell Bundy sang it best:

“I worry about where I am, not where I’m not.”

Be Happy,

Beth Terry

© 2015 Beth Terry • All Rights Reserved